Embrace The Stereotype?

Sometime in 2018, my dreams began to expand and become more colourful and defined. I wanted to do more than go to school, study engineering and practice engineering.
But there was just one hindrance;
I was just completing my second year in university, which was more than enough time for me to be fit into a cadre of the university’s hierarchy; I was the studious church girl who could be occasionally social. Never mind that in my heart and by my own definition, I was not only these things- I was more. But society doesn’t see your heart.

This is not an article designed to motivate you but, if it does, I take all the credit. This article is meant to make you think and decide what side of the coin you want to be on.

Back to my story;
At this point, I was waging a number of internal battles trying to decide whether to stick to the stereotype and avoid hassle or to manifest in my true form. Mind you, I could have still done all what I intended if I waited but the downside of that would be I’d have to do it later since I’d have had to wait for another clean slate to begin again.

While my internal battles were raging, I was being taught a lot of lessons;

1. Stereotypes are sometimes “necessary”;
Society is replete with the need to fit people into boxes, holes and whatnot for the sake of order. (You don’t believe me? Just check out your dress size) and the thing is, it’s not entirely their fault that they want to box you in. They have to do it for order and stability of the society. It doesn’t work all the time but trust me, it has some great results- your clothes fit.

2. You determine 75% of your stereotype;
What do I mean? The same way your dress sizes are determined mostly by your lifestyle and eating habits is the same way people fit you into boxes based on how~ (listen to this )~YOU act and how you portray yourself to the outside world. Never mind that your heart might be telling you something different. Society doesn’t see your heart, they only see your actions. So if society sees you as churchy, you have done something to make them see you that way.
And the good news about this is this; if you determine on a large scale what your stereotype becomes, you also have the power to change the stereotype. It might not be easy at first and there will be that period when you wouldn’t be able to fit into any holes or boxes. Embrace that period and rewrite your script, add to your story, rebrand yourself, do whatever. Just remember that the power is in your hands!

3. Stereotypes can be ladders-or pitfalls;
The definition people have of you will go a long way in determining what the future holds. Man is a social being (learnt this in my Philosophy and Total Man classes) so wherever you are, there would be the need for interacting with people and these people would have opinions of you that will determine how they view you. They’ll use these opinions to judge your capability in handling several things. Take for example; a “churchy” boy wanting to go into fashion designing, the odds would be greatly against him as opposed to a “popular” guy delving into the same field.

4. Your stereotypes help you build your connections;
Your niche is created by your stereotype and this niche forms your connection. There would be people who are willing to associate with the stereotype you have created.

I’m sure a number of people are familiar with these points because they are things that play out daily in society.

Personally, I detest stereotypes because they can be very limiting.
But something I learnt that time in 2018 is that absolutely no societal construct should limit you. So what if society has boxed you in? you are only boxed in if you have boxed your mind in by YOURSELF.
Stereotypes might never cease from society but I beseech you to ignore it or at best, use it to your advantage. Channel your life towards the path you want it to toe.

You know what I did?, I didn’t ignore the stereotype, I embraced the people it brought my way and still pursued my colourful dream cutting through several stereotypes.
I remain the studious church girl with big dream that will shock all the ones who have boxed me in.
I urge you too to pursue your dreams regardless of the stereotype.